Wednesday, July 31, 2013

Relationship Rested

We've seen the same doctor since Big C was born and she has been an important part of our life.  I credit her with being the reason I was able to breastfeed the girls until they were one.  Without her guidance and support I would have surely given up!   She volunteered to come babysit little c, at the height of her colic, so I could take a shower when B-real was away for work.  She has been so good to us.

Our schooling choice is nontraditional and I accept people may give pause to our decision.   I do believe our girls stand on their own though and are good examples of how home-schooling can work successfully.  They are far beyond grade level in their test scores, read constantly, can interact with adults and children alike, are confident and friendly.  Consequently I took it hard today, at little c's seven year check-up, when our doctor began to question my choice in schooling.  Especially when I said we aren't the type of home-schooling family who buys a curriculum and teaches from it. I explained we subscribe to more of a unschooling philosophy where we believe learning and education is all around us.  We read, talk, explore, research, get out in our communities, pursue interests of the children, take classes, travel.  Mostly though I look for opportunities to teach in our daily lives.  I don't believe learning requires lectures and worksheets.  I believe you can cover just about everything a child needs to know, especially in the elementary years, by being available for your children and by looking for opportunities to teach.  Little c has learned about division through the raspberries in our garden.  I personally believe she's more likely to recall the concept because it was taught in a way that is one, meaningful to her, and two was explored initially by her.  I did not force the idea on her and tell it was time to learn multiplication (because she is in third grade age), she came up with the questions and the natural curiosity and I went with it.  

The doctor told me she is worried about their being gaps in the girls' educations if I am not following a strict curriculum, like the schools use.  Also, she wanted to know what sort of things I am reading to the girls to ensure they are learning what they need to know.  I acknowledge there will be gaps in the girls education and I'm comfortable with it.   If there is something the girls need to know that we've missed at home, we'll either drill it at home (when they need it) or hire someone to tutor them.   I've also read that somehow kids from all over the country manage to come together for college education.  As we all know, what is taught in FL high schools is not identical to what's taught in MN high schools. 

Sadly I think our relationship with our favorite pediatrician may be coming to an end.  B-real said she probably feels comfortable expressing her concerns with us because she feels she is treating the whole child.  Personally, I don't feel it's her place to question and condemn our families' choices in education.  Our visit is intended to medically evaluate our daughter.  

Do I believe public school is the right choice for kids? No, but I don't forsake my friends and acquaintances for making that choice.   They are doing what they believe is best for their children and we do what we believe is best for ours.  Maybe people talk behind our backs and think we're crazy for choosing something unconventional?  Although I have to say it's becoming much more accepted as the years pass.   Honest to God, until today I have never had anyone criticize our choice.  There have been questions and inquisitiveness on the part of friends and strangers and I welcome the opportunity to inform and educate. 

We have a male pediatrician who we like and who sees the girls other than for their well-checks.  The older the girls get the more uncomfortable it becomes to have a male doctor do physical exams.  I started thinking about it today; I'm the parent, can't I just tell the male doctor to skip that part of the physical?   Or request that a female doctor pop in for that portion of the exam?


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